Entrepreneurship and Fear

Entrepreneurship and Fear

For as long as I can remember I have always wanted to be an entrepreneur. The problem was that no one in my middle-class Indian family had ever been a businessman. My family was not discouraging but the entire environment was. “Business is not for you”, is the mantra I heard growing up. Get security. Get a job, preferably a “secure” government job. Don’t take risks. These messages get into one’s psyche. And when I finally started my first business I found myself in the clutches of fear. I searched the libraries for a book on the subject of managing entrepreneurial fear but found nothing. Luckily, during one of my regular chats with my elder brother – my friend, philosopher and guide - I told him about my fears. He mentioned a sportsperson who had his own mental ghosts and had effectively exorcised them by speaking with a psychologist.

The decision to talk to a psychologist was not an easy one. There’s a certain stigma that’s attached to seeing a “shrink” and I didn’t want to see myself as a person who “needed help”. But my fears were affecting my productivity and my pet reaction of working twice as many hours was becoming impractical. In order to win I had to overcome my fears, so off I went to a psychologist.

I remember the first meeting clearly. I entered the office and was surprised to find that it did not have a lounge – just a straight backed chair. I sat down and as far as I remember my first words were something along the lines of “I think I am pretty normal.” And right away I noticed a slight roll of eyes. Very slight, but a roll none the less. I am not naming my doctor to protect doctor confidentiality :)

During our talks, which became more and more enjoyable for me, my doctor helped me identify my fears. I realized that I feared two things. First, I feared financial insecurity. One particular moment comes to mind. My daughter was going to be born in a few months and my tiny paycheck bounced. I was sitting in my office and asking myself, “What on earth are you doing? Your peers are making great salaries in this Internet boom and your tiny paycheck is bouncing while you are bringing a life to this world?” Second, I feared the unknown. I had a strictly technical background and lacked even basic understanding of business and I didn’t know whether anything that I was doing was right.

After helping me identify my fears he helped me realize that they were well founded. If the business failed I was going to face financial difficulties. And I really did not know anything about business. Ultimately it came down to accepting my fears as real possibilities and not avoiding them. Unexpectedly, as soon as I acknowledged my fears, they stopped bothering me as much. I came up with the idea of a decision point- a specific date for which I set clear milestones. On that date I would reassess my situation and listen to my fears. Till then whenever I heard the voice of fear I would tell it, “I think you have a point but if I keep listening to you then you will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Let me focus on my work and I will chat with you at the decision point.”

A few years later I heard Rudolf Giuliani speak at a conference. He related the story of a fireman who was off-duty on September 11. The fireman heard about the terrorist attack on the radio and he must have known about the extent of the devastation because the route he took to his fire station overlooked the towers. When he reached his station he must have known the risk he was taking because he wrote notes to his sister and mother. That day he lost his life. And through it all, he faced and managed his fears. “Courage is not the absence of fear”, Giuliani said, “It is the active management of fear.”

Comments

[Subu]

DD - Great post

--- Subu

[Cleve]

I second Subu - great post...like you I'm bootstrapping a software start-up. And like you I saw a pyschologist to help my performance - my shrink comes in from a business coaching perspective. My personal challenge was that perfectionism was hurting productivity - my fear was "fear of screwing up". He helped me find the right balance between my obsession for quality, and the need for speed and launching product, and my day-to-day performance has improved tremendously. Every entrepreneur has areas where they could improve, and fear of "getting help" often keeps them from reaching their potential.

Another way to look at it is: I'll do everything I can to help my customers!

[mbonifars]

I feel guided.. thanx DD

[Startups.in/India]

You know what DD, you can be a psychologist as well.
An amazing and inspiring post.

Nag

[Srinivas Gudipudi]

Hi DD,

A well written article DD, Entrepreuners look at fear in a disdainful way, not from the perspective of over-confidence but from the perspective of conquering them, so that they reach their goals.

Regards,
Srinivas

[Ajit Gupta]

Respected sir,

Since i am on a quest to meet all (or atleast as many as possible) intresting people (You are being described as a intresting person
on this blog)i would very much appreciate if you could find time to write a comment on my
blog
http://meetintrestingpeople.blogspot.com/2006_10_01_meetintrestingpeople_archive.html

And let me know a few things about how your company works.. that is something brief. I have taken the liberty to quote a few lines from your blog and website. If you have any objection to it being included please let me know.

[Trilok]

Hi DD,

I am an ex-employee of CA and it was great to see your blog on dimdim.
This blog is really amazing and inspiring.

Regards,
Trilok

[Dhawal Chheda]

Sir,

This post showed me a mirror with my face in it.....I too have a fear of failure....This post surely inspired my inner feeling......
great work sir......
:-)

Regards,
Dhawal